you are not Alone!

“If you are depressed, you are not the only one”, was Deepika Padukone’s concluding remark on the NDTV talk show, ‘We the People’, with Barkha Dutt. Deepika Padukone opened up about her journey with depression in this interview and shared her struggles to overcome it. The interview aired on March 21, 2015. 

The stigma surrounding mental health runs deep in the Indian society. Even if the individual acknowledges his mental ailment, the stigma prevents him from seeking help as society considers it  a sign of weakness. If the individual does accept help and takes medication to treat the mental illness then society will truly believe that the person’s dimag karrab hai.

Mental ailments like depression and anxiety are looked at as privileged conditions. Only those who are successful, rich or powerful are expected to face these ailments but not the everyday man. This idea strengthens the stigma because it isolates individuals from the problem and when the layman faces the same problems they believe that they are facing something unique only to them.  Depression and anxiety are also treated like attention pranks and thus family support is lost. Without the basic support system, the individual will crumble.

India has a very young population. Most of the population is in the age group of 18-29. If the nation cannot tackle the growing concerns of depression and anxiety it may lead to become a full fledged epidemic in another 10 years because the nation and the society will not be equipped to deal with the growing cases of depression and anxiety. And we will stagnate as the World’s Most Depressed Country.

Deepika Padukone seems to have demystified the airs surrounding depression and anxiety as she came clean about her experiences. She accepted that there was something wrong with her, because she acted in ways that seemed foreign even to her. She realized that she was feeling off and no amount of cheer or joy could make her feel normal again. She even tried to go to a different country in hopes that the experience might make her feel better but it had the opposite effect, it made her feel worse about herself. Her mother convinced her to talk to a family friend, Dr. Anna Chandy, who was also a counselor. She guided Deepika to a psychiatrist who explained to Deepika that she was not alone in her fight. Dr. Shyam Bhat explained to her that many individuals in the world today share similar feelings and she was not the only one who was confused and tormented about her life. She was hesitant to take medication, but then her father reasoned to her that if she had a headache or any physical ailment she would take a tablet without thinking otherwise, why should it be any different with medication for mental health. She also debunks the myth that depression and anxiety are privileged ailments. She stresses that almost all people, irrespective of their economic status, feel depressed.

Why would Deepika’s story influence the people of India? In particular why would the struggles of a film star, an icon, change the mindset of the general public? In my opinion, the people will be greatly influenced by her because this proves that she is also a mere human being.

In India, celebrities have often been put up on too high a pedestal that it becomes difficult to associate shortcomings with them. When these stars admit their 'humanness' it gets the attention of the public. We have seen many celebrities end their lives because of their mental illness and many people around them may or may not have known about their condition. This proves that even the film stars succumb to the stigma attached to mental health and would rather brave it alone than be subjected to the ridicule. People realize that their idols are not exempted from shortcomings and they experience feelings of sadness and anxiety just like normal people do. 

Celebrities also act as role models. In promoting the benefits of fitness, one might often see the example of Bipasha Basu and Shilpa Shetty being used as most women aim to be like them. Celebrities also motivate and inspire people to contribute to their causes, the most visible being ‘Being Human’ by Salman Khan.  So, when Deepika Padukone starts to talk about mental health, people will most likely listen and maybe even endorse and contribute to the cause.

Of course, it goes without saying that celebrities are also trendsetters in society. Because of their huge fan following, it may be easier for the celebrities to instill new ideas and create awareness about a particular issue. And that is what we see Deepika Padukone do. She has opened up about her fight with depression in hopes that she might at least touch one life. Her foundation, ‘Live Laugh Love’, aims at providing mental health care, a step towards reducing the stigma attached to it.

This initiative not only helps the general public but also other film stars who can come out of their shells to admit to these mental problems because they realize that their colleagues too, go through the same thing.

In conclusion, Deepika’s confession has set the wheel in motion to reduce the stigma attached to mental health and spread awareness about the importance of the treatment before it is too late.  With 25 million likes on Facebook and 10 million followers on Twitter, Deepika Padukone is already making a huge impact among her fans by bringing this issue out in the open. If other celebrities with their huge fan following promote the awareness of mental health, it would play a vital role in countering the stigma associated with mental health.

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Find below Deepika Padukone's full interview with Barkha Dutt.

A Serrated Life

Whenever I am angry, I believe in channeling my emotions into various mediums so that I can feel calm again. I remember writing this story when I was extremely angry and as punching a wall was not an option I decided to write the story 'A Serrated Life'. The calm I felt after ending the story was not fulfilling but at least I did not have the urge to punch the wall anymore, so in that sense it helped. 

A small lesson learnt, now shared.

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She had learned to survive the hard way.

Being shuffled in the system for 16 years had taught her to make it out on her own. She started out with a few basic fight moves that she remembered watching on TV. She could throw a solid punch that could knock out a guy senseless. As she grew her skills not only improved but they became deadlier.

She still remembered her first fight. She took on a man twice her size. She was coming out of a party when a man thought it would be funny to size her up. She grabbed her knife and sliced his throat. It wasn’t even a fight. From then on, word spread through the streets that a new fighter was threatening the status quo. She fought everyone; male, female, teens, junkies. Most of the fights she won, but the ones she did lose her attacker did not live long enough to tell the tale. She had made a name for herself, ‘Bloody Mary’ they called her, because that was all she left for the police, red bloodstains on the wall, no body.

This time seemed different. She found herself back against the wall in a dark alley overlooking the dimly lit streets, with four bulky men around her, blocking all escape. Just when she was about to make her move she heard one of her assailants say,

“Well, well, well, look what we have here. Are you going to run away scared, kitty cat?” this caused the other three men to start laughing.

“In your dreams”, she said in a cold voice that made them all shut up.

She quickly grabbed her serrated blade and stabbed the nearest man. Her lips curled up in a wicked sneer as she twisted the knife deeper into the man’s body. He gave a blood-curdling scream as he fell to his knees but she paid no mind, she gave the knife one last twist and let the man fall to his death.

The other three men stared at her, anger immediately replacing the shock on their faces. Two men circled her, each waiting for the other to attack. They made the first move; expecting them to attack she widened her arms in defense but surprisingly they held on to her arms. She could feel the bruises starting to form on her wrists but that was the least of her concerns. The last man, the one who had spoken to her, walked slowly towards her and stopped in front of her. He raised his hand and gently grazed her cheek with his rough knuckles before slapping her across her face.  The force of the slap would have been enough to send her flying halfway across the alley if the men were not holding onto her. Before she could feel the blood trickling down her lip, she felt a sharp blow to her stomach, followed by several hard punches. She tried to move away but it was no use, the men had her in a death grip. She watched as the man slowly walked and retrieved her blade from the dead man’s abdomen and plunge it into her side. But before he had a chance to twist the knife she used her head to give him a head-butt. She felt the grip on her hands loosen and she moved out of them with cat-like agility.

She felt the man come up behind her and she turned around and met his blow with a kick of her own. She followed it by a few jabs. His weight made it a little difficult for him to move and she took advantage of it. She grabbed an empty beer bottle and hit him over the head, allowing her a few moments to deal with her other assailants. The pain in her waist started to grow and she could feel her T-shirt grow damp with her blood. She pulled two spears from her boots and walked towards them. She could see the fear in their eyes and she smiled.  

“Don’t worry. It will all be over in a minute,” she whispered as she drove it into their hearts. She carefully pulled out the knife from her side and turned to face the last man.

“I won’t be that easy to kill, kitty cat.” Said a voice from behind her.

“Where would be the fun in that?”

Before she could turn around, he hit her on the shoulder with an old pipe. Pain surged through her body as she felt her shoulder dislocate. He got in a few punches but she just walked towards him. Once she got close to him she plunged the knife into the nape of his neck. He screamed and tried to get the knife out but it was too late, she had already twisted his neck. She felt his body go limp as she pulled out the blade. She spared the men a glance as she made her way to the dimly lit street. She held onto her shoulder and thought,

Done surviving, now to live...

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Read the below article by Sigmund Freud on Creative Writers and Day-Dreaming to get a Psychoanalytic view of the whole thing. If you ignore Freud's 'unfulfilled childhood fantasies' and 'unmet sexual desires' theories, the article does explain the idea of channeling emotions and thoughts quite well.